Reflections On Ones Past

Looking back, one wonders about their past. Would it be different if a different choice was made at one time? Would one be alive if they took that challenge when it arose?

Me, I look back at all the wonderful ladies who have helped shape my past. The ladies who have shared my life at one point or another. The ladies who I have shared tears, laughter, the good times and the bad times. These many ladies have all helped to create me as I am today. But what EXACTLY is that?

Looking way way back, I can recall, as if it was only yesterday, my first ever girlfriend, Mandy. The beautiful Mandy who saw in me something that she liked. To this day, I have no idea what it was. At 16, Mandy and I had no idea what we were doing. But we did it anyway. “IT” being everything that teenagers do, You know, back row at the movies, not watching much, well, of the movie anyway.  How many times Mandy and I just wanted to be together will never be known now. However, Mandy still owns a part of my heart which can never be taken away. Mandy, you are STILL beautiful.

Still way back, I met Alison. A very intelligent and caring lady. Alison was a florist when we met. I helped at the shop she worked at just to be with her. We would get into the car, one of 3 or 4, and go up to Maroochydore and just laze around for a weekend. Alison is married now. Congratulations.

Not so far back, but still many years ago, I met Diane. What a wonderful and caring lady. Diane and I were very close. We shared many good times and a few sad times. Diane and I would go away for weekends on the Gold Coast. Oh what a time Diane and I had together. Diane is also married now. Married to a friend. I am a still close friend with Diane and I will forever hold her dear to me.

Lorrae. A very quiet lady, until you get to know her. I met Lorrae at a nightclub in ’86. Lorrae showed me dance music like I had never heard before. To this day, I still play that music. Lorrae reminds me of a time when music seemed to rule my life. Lorrae and I are still close friends. We still go out for dinners, lunch at the Hilton or Sukiyaki.

Then along came Anna! What a contrast in people. Anna is forever happy. Always smiling and willing to help anyone in a pinch. Anna Another of those beautiful ladies who I had the pleasure to date. Anna and I lived together in Camp Hill for a few months. Until we grew apart. To this day, Anna and I are still friends, though we rarely talk

Sandra, oh Sandra. When I mention Sandra’s name around Diane’s husband John, he tells me to “get a life”. The reason for this is because even after 6 years, I still hold a candle for her. Sandra, out of all the ladies I have dated, is the ONLY one who gave me the courage to quit my job, go to college and get a job that I really enjoy. My hat goes off to Sandra.

Melanie, John's ex girlfriend whom I met just after her 21st birthday. Melanie was a brunette with long hair. We had many good times but the break-up was difficult, for both of us. I can not remember why we broke up, sometimes I would like to call and say Hi, find out how she is doing and catch up. As far as I know, Melanie is now living in Toowoomba somewhere.

Now I am single. Have been for about 3 years. Is there life after love? I wonder. But I am still alive, breathing and still enjoying my job. Some may call me a work-a-holic. I prefer to say that I love my job. Whatever you may think, I am still the same person who I was back then. Back in my past. Maybe a little older physically, but definitely 16 at heart. I wonder if Mandy did that to me?

There is a lady who I like a lot, Marianne. A beautiful lady, who plays the piano, goes to Uni and has stolen my heart. Marianne, a lady who knows how I feel about her, and does not shy away. A VERY sensual lady who I have fallen for. Marianne and I met at a club that a very good friend of mine owns. Marianne can have any guy she wants, so how do I compete? I don’t. I don’t because I value Marianne’s friendship very much and do not want to lose that. Many a man has lost a friend due to competing for a lady’s affections. This is NOT my style. If I like a lady and she likes me, and anything happens, then GREAT! If not, then I have a wonderful friend. Marianne is a very special lady to me, as she well knows. Marianne makes me feel good about myself.

Well, enough reflections. Now on with the future..

25/3/98
 

Back to Personal Docs